Not home yet

The search is on; the search that consumes all of our lives, whether we know it or not. We all seek happiness; we all seek something that will satisfy our hearts. So like a scavenger hunt, we all race about filling our lives with what we think might make us happy and fill the void in our lives. However the sad fact is that I am not just writing about unbelievers who do not love the Lord, but also of those who love Jesus. How do I know this is so? Because I am one of them.


I love Jesus, and I confess that He is my Lord and Savior; but I am sinner. I easily take my eyes off Christ and seek my joy in other things. I forget that I am not home yet, and in a frantic rush I try to make this world feel like home. Is it any wonder when I lose heart and become discouraged because my attempts fail?! Only Jesus Christ can satisfy my heart and fill my soul with delight. I was not made for this world, and so it only makes sense that this world and everything in it will NEVER satisfy my heart.

At times life can be quite frustrating. I go off into the world to spread my wings, and find it a lonely, indifferent place so I long for the warmth of home, but when I get back home I do not find what I imagined to find. Instead I am left frustrated and wondering why I am not finding the happiness I sought. I have heard the same of marriage. Someone not married thinks that if only he were married, then he would be truly happy; but after the fact he thinks that maybe if he were single again he would be happier. We covet what others have; we envy others happiness; we claw for all we can grab in this world; we spend our money and buy what we see, hoping to buy something that will fill more than our hands; but we come away emptier than ever though we possess more than we ever had before. Perhaps we were made for something more than this…

In Jeremiah 20 the Lord says to His people: “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” God has placed all of us in this world, and the search is on. The problem is we are searching for the wrong things! We are seeking earthly happiness that does not satisfy our souls. We must stop doing this, and instead look to Jesus to fill our hearts with joy. We must seek God with ALL OF OUR HEARTS and we will find Him; we will find true joy and satisfaction in Him alone.

This earth is not our home. So we must stop trying to make it look and feel like home. Fight the battle of faith, seek the Lord with all of your heart, run the good race; but know that this earth is not home and will never be home. Not until that day when we leave this body behind will we be home. And in that instant God will transform us into Christ’s likeness and the sin that so long tormented us on this earth will be forever gone. We will find our joy in Christ alone and the search will be over. But our happiness will have only just began…each moment will become better and more wonderful then the next.

Birthday Reflections

Well, I welcomed my birthday in today at the stroke of midnight as I stood JOOD (Junior Officer of the Deck) watch. It is hard to believe that a year has passed since I turned twenty, but as I look back over this year, I am amazed by all that God has been teaching me. I have spent about six months of this year underway, living side by side with unbelievers without a way of escape (or perhaps they were the ones who did not have a way to escape me…it is all a matter of perspective). God has taken me through valleys, and He has also leaded me to the heights as I have experienced both spiritual highs and lows. I feel as though He has been putting me through His own course of Evangelism 101.




Now (as everyone here is sure to inform me) I have reached the age of ultimate freedom…I am no longer constrained by age limitations (for the most part) and I can live and party it up big time. But little do they know that they are not free themselves, but rather they are slaves to their sin. I am no longer a slave to sin because I have been redeemed by Jesus’ blood. So I press on as Christ’s slave; His ambassador here. I am His light in this darkness, reflecting His beauty to the people here. And at times my heart is burdened and I feel like I cannot go on one more step, but Jesus gives me strength. His love is so great that He does not hesitate to hold my soul in the fire to refine and purify me to be made like Jesus. He etches His character into my soul, and it hurts but He fills me with a greater joy in knowing Him that far outweighs any pain.



So many people live for this fleeting moment in time, but soon it shall fade away. However my heart is set on eternity….so they fill their lives with comfort and pleasure now, but I press on for something greater for that which is unseen. We all expend ourselves for something. I will be spent no matter what I live for, but what I am spent for shall make all the difference in my life. I want to be spent for Jesus…I want my life to be consumed by an undying passion to glorify His name all the days of my life. I am now 21, and my mind is set, my purpose solid---In Christ I press on in faith, His praise is the theme of my life.

Quotes to Inspire

"People who do not know the Lord ask why in the world we waste our lives as missionaries. They forget that they too are expending their lives ... and when the bubble has burst, they will have nothing of eternal significance to show for the years they have wasted."
-- Nate Saint, missionary martyr



“Would that God would make hell so real to us that we cannot rest; Heaven so real that we must have men there.” – Hudson Taylor




"I have but one candle of life to burn, and I would rather burn it out in a land filled with darkness than in a land flooded with light"
-- John Keith Falconer



"Some wish to live within the sound of a chapel bell; I wish to run a rescue mission within a yard of hell."
 -- C.T. Studd



“God had only one Son and he made that Son a missionary.”
 -- David Livingston



"He is no fool who gives up what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose"
-- Jim Elliot


"God isn't looking for people of great faith, but for individuals ready to follow Him"
-- Hudson Taylor


 
When James Calvert went out as a missionary to the cannibals of the Fiji Islands, the ship captain tried to turn him back, saying, "You will lose your life and the lives of those with you if you go among such savages." To that, Calvert replied, "We died before we came here."



"Someone asked, will the heathen who have never heard the Gospel be saved? It is more a question with me whether we -- who have the Gospel and fail to give it to those who have not -- can be saved."
 -- Charles Spurgeon



God uses men who are weak and feeble enough to lean on him."
-- Hudson Taylor, missionary to China



How sweet the name of Jesus sounds

In a believer's ear;
It soothes his sorrows, heals his wounds,
And drives away his fear.
~John Newton



To be able to lead others, a man must be willing to go forward alone.

- Harry Truman

 
Never . . . Never . . . Never . . . Never Give up!

- Winston Churchill

Blown Away!

Well, it has been quite a while since I last posted anything. Life has been busy and filled with lots of good challenges. I have been mess cooking the past two weeks, which can be draining. The Lord is ever faithful in sustaining me and upholding me through His Word and through cross-centered music. I have come to love the song by Aaron Shust, "My Savior and My God." I  would listen to that as I washed dishes and cleaned tables. God has greatly encouraged my heart with His love throughout the past several weeks...when I feel down and discouraged, He brings the Gospel to my mind. "Christ has died for me, He has made a way that I can have peace with God, I am clothed in His righteousness, and in Him I hide!" Preaching the Gospel to myself is a definite must to keep my eyes focused on the cross. I do have some fellow Believers here on the boat, but most of them do not think about the cross and live discouraged lives. It is only by God's grace that He has taught me that the Gospel is not just for unbelievers but for Believers!

Now that I am no longer mess cooking, I will be working back in Navigation. I am also taking two classes that keep me busy with homework and projects. I am doing well, though even if I don't have lots of down time...it helps make the patrol go faster. I miss all of you back home, and it encourages me greatly knowing that you are lifting me up in your prayers.

I suppose if I were to sum up the past several months and even the past two years, the lessons God has taught me all seem to derive from the book of Philippians. The joy we have as followers of Christ is not based off of circumstances and feelings, but off of Him. Situations, people, pain, suffering, and even sin can never take away that which is most imoprtant to me---Jesus! Oh how I love Him...sometimes I feel like I could explode with the joy in knowing Him...and to think I have only tasted but a small bit of it. I am comforted by the fact that I am not HOME yet! Someday I will be with Jesus...and I will see Him face to face. My faith will be turned to sight. What a wonderful day that will be! My fellow Coasties cannot comprehend my joy nor the reason I am so happy when I tell them why...because I know Jesus and He fills me with joy. It is a mystery to them, but not to me. How could I be anything but joyful in knowing and being known by the Almighty God who has saved me. Believers who do not think and rejoice in the Gospel daily will be robbed of joy, drained of strength, and conformed to the word around them. We must fight for joy...true, lasting joy in Jesus. Sometimes God's presence seems far away...maybe even gone...but we must not trust our feelings. When God's presence seems far away cling to His promises.

So here I am clinging to the promises of God, amazed by His love, and filled with joy in knowing Him. I am saved by grace and I no longer live but Jesus Christ lives in me. I am not home yet, but someday soon I will be with Jesus and until then I want to live life with all I have got for His glory. O that I may be spent and used up for Him and make it to my heavenly home all used up, spilled out, and worn out from serving Jesus...and yes, smiling as I cross the finish line.