26 November 2010

The List

Once upon a time, lived a man who struggled with the weight of guilt. He did everything he could to keep from feeling so guilty, but nothing seemed to work. So in desperation, he went to the house of a wise old man who lived at the edge of town.

The man explained his problem to the wise man and waited for a reply. The wise man gazed at him intently and stroked his pointy beard. “So why do you feel so guilty,” he asked. “What have you done?”

“Sir, I am weighed down by all my sin.”

“Have you turned to Christ to forgive you of your sin?” The wise man asked.

“Oh, certainly I have, Sir, but I still feel guilty. I try to live a life that pleases Christ, but even when I am doing good things my motives are so wicked and sinful.”

“I see. Do you believe that you are saved by grace and not by works?”

“Oh yes, of course I am saved by grace, but I cannot seem to live up to the grace God has given me.”

The wise man smiled at the troubled man. “Oh, I see, there is only one thing that can be done.”

The troubled man listened attentively as the wise man explained his solution. “For the next thirty days you must write down everything you do and say and think. You must keep a detailed record of it all whether it is good or bad. And then at the end of the thirty days I want you to bring the list to me.”

The man felt puzzled and confused. “Why must I keep a list? It grieves my heart already without keeping track of everything I do.”

“Just do as I say.”

The man shook his head and walked away, but because he was so troubled by the feelings of guilt and sorrow he decided to try it just in case it helped relieve his pain. The days passed ever so slowly. He kept a detailed record of it all just as the wise man had said. Some days He felt almost elated because he felt that surely he was improving, but then just as soon as his elation reached it’s peak he would sink again realizing his heart was gloating in pride. His list seemed to go on forever.

Finally thirty days passed, and one thing the man knew for sure: keeping a list had not made him feel any better or less guilty. If anything it had made things worse. So he returned to the wise man more sorrowful than before.

“Here is my list,” he said as he handed the wise man a thick stack of papers. “But I don’t think it has cured my feelings of guilt.

“Well, is this everything?” the wise man asked.

“Yes it is everything,” the man answered. “My guilt feels heavier than ever now."

The wise man walked over to his fireplace and knelt by the hearth. The man almost gasped in shock as the wise, old man held the list into the fire. The man looked on in horror as the old man’s hand blistered from the angry flames.

“What, what are you doing? Your hand! And my list--- it took me hours to work on the list. Why would you do this?”

The wise man did not answer, but instead took the ash shovel on the hearth and scooped up the ashes from the papers into a bowl. He motioned for the man to follow him as he walked out of his house and over to a river not far away. He took the ashes and threw them into the rushing water which quickly swept the ashes away. The man was dumbfounded as he watched on in disbelief.

The wise man turned back to the troubled man and smiled. “Where has your guilt gone now?”

The man shook his head, “It’s been swept away, my list has been swept away,” he paused. “Your hand is burned.”

“Your list could not have been taken away without a price, and you could not pay it, so I did.”

“My dear friend, what I have done is only a picture of what Christ has already done. He has taken your sin upon Himself and paid its penalty, and now your guilt is swept away. Christ paid the price. So now go your way and stop thinking about your guilt for it is no more---just like your list is gone forever. Instead think about Jesus and how much he loves you and how gracious He is in saving you.”


...Dear Lord, I only have three months on this patrol to testify to the Gospel of your grace; I only have such a short time to make much of Your name by living out my faith before my fellow Coasties. You have placed me here for a reason and it was not to complain and wish away the days I'll be out at sea; It was not to dread each moment and wish it is all over. No, You have placed me here as Your witness to share the hope you have given me---to share the glorious gospel with those arround me. So Lord Jesus, enable me to do Your will: give me words to speak---to tell of Your amazing grace; give me eyes to see---to see the opportunities You will set before me to share my faith; give me a heart of compassion---so that I can be Christ to these lost sinners; and give me boldness to say what needs to be said, to stand up for what it right, to testify to the truth of Your Word, to live out my faith in humility, to be committed to prayer, dedicated to God's Word, and fully relying upon Christ to supply my every need. I am nothing Lord Jesus, You are my everything---You are my all in all. I cannot do anything that pleases You apart from You so please enable me to do Your work. May You recieve all the glory and praise, may Your name be exalted over all, and may You be the supreme joy in my life every single day.

I only have three months...Lord Jesus, may I not waste this time You have given me...may I make the most of this great opportunity.

Dear Friends and Family, please keep me in Your prayers that I would not waste this patrol.

A Most Awesome Thanksgiving!

November 26, 2010

Yesterday, I had a most wonderful Thanksgiving on board my boat. I missed being with family, but God blessed me with good friends to celebrate the day with. I give thanks to my Mighty God who has placed me upon the Midgett as His servant and ambassador. Oh how I love Him all because He first loved me!

So me and my friends started the morning off by watching The Passion of Jesus Christ. My friend Jackie who committed her life to Jesus recently (praise Jesus!), wanted to watch it and a lot of others on board joined us on the mess deck. I also enjoyed some reading, and I was so happy to call my family and talk to everybody! I also got to help in the kitchen, making Thanksgiving dinner...it was so fun! We made apple pie and turkey with all the trimmings. I wish I could put up pics, but my laptop that has those capabilities is at the doctor's right now)-: Soon!!!

But it was an amazing day and I thank God for blesssing me so tremendously!!!

November 24, 2010

November 24, 2010

Winter has certainly set in here in Seattle, and all is snowy and white. I was out and about earlier, getting some last minute things at the store for my upcoming patrol, and I could definitely feel the icy wind cut right through my coat. Now I am staying nice and warm in my rack, writing, and listening to Christmas music. Tonight shall be fun because I bought all the makings for s’mores!!! So I am going to see who all wants to join me in s’more making and eating later on.

It is hard to believe that I will be heading back out to sea here very soon. This week I have been especially praying and committing this upcoming patrol to the Lord. I do not want to waste the time God has given me to be His light here on the Midgett, and now as I realize that this will be my last patrol, I want to make sure I make the most of every second. I want to glorify God in all that I say and do and think; I want to make much of Jesus; and I want to finish hard, testifying to the Gospel of God’s grace to the people who are here on board with me. I do not want to leave here, and people think that I was just a nice person, that I was just an optimistic person---no I want them to know without a shadow of a doubt that the reason I smile every day is not just because I am a happy person; that the reason I wake up each morning is not just because the sun decided to rise; that the reason I work hard when others are not is not because I am just a “go getter”; that the reason I don’t complain when others are complaining is not just because I have fortitude---no the reason for all of this is because I know Jesus and He has saved me and filled my heart with joy! He is the reason not anything else…and I want everyone on this boat to know that Jesus is the one who makes me smile, He is the one who fills my heart with joy, He is the one who has given me a living hope, He is the one who has saved me, and He alone can satisfy their hearts.

Pray for me, because I can do nothing in my own strength. Pray that I will trust Jesus to be my strength and courage. It is so completely silly and ridiculous that I give in to fear when I serve the King of kings and Lord of lords. So I ask the Lord for help to sustain me and strengthen me to do His will. I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Phil. 4:13)!!!

So I press on, rejoicing in my Mighty Savior, resting in my merciful Father, and working in the power of the Holy Spirit to proclaim the Gospel here for the glory of God.

Immanuel: God with us. And if God is with us who can stand against us? I shall not fear for my God is with me!

Jesus, Lover of my Soul

November 2, 2010

Jesus, Lover of my soul,

My greatest joy…in You I am made whole.

Your love is truly better than life,

And I will live with my eyes fixed upon Christ!

Unto You Lord, I lift up my voice.

To declare Your praise…in You I rejoice!

You Are the way, the truth, the life;

You took my place and have given me new life!

25 November 2010


Thanksgiving Day 2010

I give thanks to You, O God, for You are holy and good; You are gracious and merciful to me.
By Your great love, You have saved me and called me Your own through the death of Jesus my Savior.
For I was lost, dead in my sin; I completely and utterly hated You above all things. I did not obey Your righteous laws nor was I attentive to follow in Your ways. No, like a sheep I had gone astray, I had turned to my own way.
But in You great mercy and compassion You came to earth and sought me out. You found me and forgave  me my sins.
You lived a perfect life and fulfilled the law on my behalf. You were betrayed and disowned by Your friends and handed over to wicked men. You were mocked and beaten, You were laughed at and scorned by the ones You had made. You held their very lives in Your hands as they spit on You and beat You. Then You were led to Golgotha as You carried Your cross. You were nailed to it and hung upon it. You not only bore the horrible physical torremnt from the hands of sinnful man, but You also bore the wrath of God. You crushed by Your Father and He turned His face away from You because You took upon Yourself the sin of all who would believe. You became sin for us though You had never sinned, and You gave us Your righteousness though we had never done anything good.
You were pierced for our transgressions and crushed for our iniquity and by Your wounds we are healed.
You die upon the cross and gave up Your life as a ransom for many. Then they laid You in the tomb, but You did not remain there for long because on the third day You arose! God was satisfied with Your sacrifice and brought You back from the grave. Our atonement had been made now we could come to the Father through Jesus the Son.
Thank You Lord Jesus for this priceless gift of salvation. Thank You for giving us Yourself and for making peace between God and man.
We are now hidden in Jesus covered by the blood of the Lamb.
So I give You thanks, O God, for apart from You I would be destined for Hell---seperated from You forever---I would never have known true joy and never received abundant life. So I give thanks to precious Jesus and I glory in Your holy name.
O Immanuel has come! God is with us! We are not alone in this world for God is with us. O thank You Jesus Christ!

15 November 2010

Precious Treasures

(A poem I wrote when I was underway this past fall)

Precious treasures; gifts from God.
Hold and love them for they'll soon be gone. 
For just like arrows strung on a bow,
You'll lead and teach them, but then you must let go.

So treasure each moment as though it's the last.
You'll never regret this time when it's passed.
So take the little hands in yours and do not delay,
In loving and hugging and correcting today.
Train up the little hearts to follow hard after Christ
To love and to trust Him and give Him their lives.

So live in the present and treasure its worth;
For yesterday is gone and tomorrow is yet to give birth.
For shorter than the blink of an eye,
These few precious years will have all too soon flown by.
And know as I look back at the days of the past;
The time with my family was truly a blast!

13 November 2010

Pressing on in Christ

The Lord has blessed me with a wonderful Saturday. I enjoyed breakfast at IHOP with some friends from my boat, and then I headed to one of my favorite places in the world (not really!) Barnes & Noble. But on a rainy Seattle day, a book store is a perfect way to spend the day(-:

As I sit here right now looking back over the past couple weeks, I am just completely blown away by God's amazing grace! The work I have seen Him doing in the lives of the people on my boat, overwhelms my heart. And I know that God has always been at work on my boat even when I cannot see...but how amazing it has been to see the work of the Lord. O He is mighty to save!

My prayer to the Lord has been that He will give me a heart of compassion for the people on my boat. I have never been through what most of these people have gone through, and when they tell me their struggles and the suffering they are experiencing...most of the times I do not know what to say. I beg God in my heart for words, but often times I am at a loss. And perhaps that is best and what God wants. Maybe the very thing He wants me to say is nothing, but to pray for them and tell them verses from the Bible. I am His servant here, and I want to glorify His name in everything.

God is so good to me and sustains me every new moment. I remember when I first arrived on the Midgett, people were so amazed that I was always smiling...when I was painting, when I was mess cooking, when I was vacuuming up water in the rain! I remember they would tell me that, once I had been on the boat for a couple months I would be just like them and hate life. Well, a couple months passed by and I was still smiling (not because of me but because Jesus gave me such an amazing joy in Him), so they told me that it was because I had never been out to sea before, and once I was underway I would be just like them and hate life and the boat. Well, I went out to sea on my first patrol in the Puget Sound (and lived to tell about it!!!!), and was smiling more than ever. They told me it was because I had never gone down south on a patrol. They said those patrols would be the ones to break me. Well, we went down south and I was still smiling and still filled with joy in Jesus. And now I have been here on the Midgett over a year! And I think everyone has finally given up. God has been at my side, faithfully sustaining me every moment. He is the one who supplies me with joy here on my boat. Apart from Him I would be like everyone else...the only difference between me and them is that I have Jesus in my heart, filling me with inexpressible joy. I have hope in Jesus and this hope is anchored in Christ. I am held by grace and sustained by grace. I would walk away from Christ, I would give up, I would go down the same path of self-destruction that the other people on my boat are on if it were not for God's amazing grace. Thank You Jesus, for I do not deserve Your grace, but You have lavished it upon me anyway. I am in awe of how mighty and gracious You are! Praise be unto Your name!

And now here in a few short weeks, I will be getting back underway and heading back out to sea for another three months. I am going to miss land and my coffee shops and my church family, but I am convinced that this is God's will and that He has me on  the Midgett for such a time as this. Soon my time on the Midgett will come to an end...but until then I am here to declare the gospel of God's grace. And my goal is to share it with eveyone on this boat---that everyone would know the reason I smile and the reason I am joyful. This will probably be my last patrol and then I will be going to advanced training school and after that go to a new duty station and finish up my remaining time in the Coast Guard. So just like a runner in a race sprints his very hardest as he sees the finish line come into sight...so I also sprint with all my might to the finish line. O God may I glorify you on the Midgett and declare your name and praise that all may know that You are God and You are mighty to save. I pray that when others look at me they would see You...I want to point to You in everything.

So as I prepare for this upcoming patrol, I face it with a renewed joy and a resolved determination to proclaim the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I am so excited! And yes I am afraid and scared to death at the same time! But I know the One true God and He is so wonderful and so good...and He supplies all my needs. He gives me strength, He gives me joy, HE HAS GIVEN ME SALVATION! I know that in Jesus Christ I am more than a conqueor because He has loved me and made me His own.

So I press on hard after Jesus. He holds me by His grace, He sustains me with His love, He teaches me in His faithfulness, and HE IS ALWAYS WITH ME. He will never leave me...in Him I press on...in Him I am strong, though I am weak...courageous, though I am afraid...righteous, though my works are as filthy rags. I am hidden in Christ!

05 November 2010

Jesus, You Are My Treasure!

I wanted to share some of the things that God has challenged me with the past several days. How gracious and wonderful He is! He is faithful to make me more and more like Jesus (Philippians 1:6)! Each new day, I am more amazed by how precious my Savior is and how merciful He is to me. My sin is so great...BUT MY SAVIOR IS GREATER STILL!

We are in a constant battle...a battle not against flesh and blood, but a battle to fight sin and live for Jesus. This is not some imaginary battle that pastors and Sunday school teachers talk about in church on Sunday...it is SERIOUS because it is the fight of a Believer to treasure Jesus above all. God must be first in everything in our lives...He must be first in our thoughts, in our relationships with others, in our work, in our school, in our words, in our motives, in our dreams, in our goals...IN EVERYTHING! The Holy Spirit has convicted me of this sin...because even though I want Jesus to be first, often times I do not make Him first. I become lazy and comfortable...I become distracted and take my eyes off Jesus and then I slip beneath the waves like Peter, but praise be to Jesus that He is gracious and merciful and saves sinners like me! So I am challenged to press on today, fighting sin, making God first in everything, enjoying Him, glorifying Him with my life, taking every though captive to the obedience of Christ...yet I can do absolutely nothing, but I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! Jesus is my treasure!!!! My heart is overwhelmed by His love and grace.
So I shall close for now...but this is the work God is doing in my life.

Lord Jesus, You are my treasure! You are the best thing in my life. Apart from you, my life is empty and worthless. You are the Spring of Living Water; in You is fullness of joy! I will follow after you...do whatever it takes to make me like You, Jesus. Blessed be Your Name!

A True Story to Inspire and Motivate

(Here is a true story a friend shared with me...hope you all enjoy!!!)
Brenda was almost halfway to the top of the tremendous granite cliff. She was standing on a ledge where she was taking a breather during this, her first rock climb. As she rested there, the safety rope snapped against her eye and knocked out her contact lens.  
"Great", she thought. "Here I am on a rock ledge, hundreds of feet from the bottom and hundreds of feet to the top of this cliff, and now my sight is blurry."

She looked and looked, hoping that somehow it had landed on the ledge. But it just wasn't there.
She felt the panic rising in her, so she began praying. She prayed for calm, and she prayed that she may find her contact lens.

When she got to the top, a friend examined her eye and her clothing for the lens, but it was not to be found. Although she was calm now that she was at the top, she was saddened because she could not clearly see across the range of mountains. She thought of the bible verse "The eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth."

She thought, "Lord, You can see all these mountains. You know every stone and leaf, and You know exactly where my contact lens is. Please help me."

Later, when they had hiked down the trail to the bottom of the cliff they met another party of climbers just starting up the face of the cliff. One of them shouted out, "Hey, you guys! Anybody lose a contact lens?"

Well, that would be startling enough, but you know why the climber saw it? An ant was moving slowly across a twig on the face of the rock, carrying it!

The story doesn't end there. Brenda's father is a cartoonist. When she told him the incredible story of the ant, the prayer, and the contact lens, he drew a cartoon of an ant lugging that contact lens with the caption, "Lord, I don't know why You want me to carry this thing. I can't eat it, and it's awfully heavy. But if this is what You want me to do, I'll carry it for You."

I think it would do all of us some good to say,
"God, I don't know why You want me to carry this load. I can see no good in it and it's awfully heavy. But, if You want me to carry it, I will."
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

Destroying Our Idols

God's Will or Your Own?



Written for my family as they move to Cameroon, Africa to share Jesus love with the people there.

Rejoicing in all God has done.
In your lives, I see Him displayed
As your greatest treasure of all;
Your mission: to proclaim His name.

Fix Your eyes on Christ…Run hard to the goal.
Consider the work He has done, He has saved your souls!

Press on, HOPE IN GOD…IN HIS HANDS you are safe. UNDER HIS WINGS…you are held---
you are HELD BY GRACE.
Take up your cross, follow Christ, let His praises resound.
as you journey HOMEWARD BOUND.

Cheering you on as you go
As you make much of Jesus today,
Considering all else as loss
Compared to the Savior’s name.

Fight the battle of faith…stand firm in Christ.
Trust Him with all of your heart, give Him your life.

Press on, HOPE IN GOD…IN HIS HANDS you are safe. UNDER HIS WINGS…you are held---
you are HELD BY GRACE.
Take up your cross, follow Christ, let His praises resound.
as you journey HOMEWARD BOUND.

Praying for you in my heart.
May God’s sustaining grace push you on
To follow Christ outside of the camp,
Calling the nations to join the song!

Jesus is mighty to save
For while yet sinners He died in our place.
Shout---shout His praise For He has given us grace!

Press on, HOPE IN GOD…IN HIS HANDS you are safe. UNDER HIS WINGS…you are held---
Take up your cross, follow Christ, let His praises resound.
as you journey HOMEWARD BOUND.

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